Where Have All the Smiles Gone?
You’ve probably noticed the weird social interactions lately - thanks face masks. Whether it’s just acknowledging a coworker or greeting a friend, every conversation is tinged with a sense of uncertainty and I blame the loss of smiles.
With half of everyone’s face covered in cloth how are we supposed to gauge reactions, broach topics (especially serious ones), or approach someone? I find myself questioning every conversation: Are they mad? Did they think my joke was funny? Is that Karen or Carole?
Smiling has been proven time and time again to help reduce stress, so how do we handle a stressful time without it?
Truth is we need smiles, smirks, toothy grins in order to carry on what we feel like is a normal day. Without the option to just throw a smile at someone, we’ve begun utilizing other means to fill in the gaps:
1. Jazz Hands
I’ve always talked with my hands but now it feels more necessary. Like the flapping of my arms in the air is the only way to tell my coworker how good my weekend is. But hand motions and body language can help express what’s hidden under the mask, kind of like a superhero. Basically we are all Batman - except not as buff, thanks to our extra quarantine pounds.
2. Small Talk
Suddenly weather has become the most interesting topic- I’m told constantly about what it feels like outdoors. Have face masks hindered real conversations? Mostly, it seems small talk has become essential because without the ability to read lips we have all suddenly lost our hearing. So, talking about anything serious can become vexing after the third, “huh?”
3. Head nods, winks, & other slight gestures
Instead of smiling at someone when you pass them in the hall, we’ve started using head nods, waves, or winks. I must admit that I prefer the nod and it’s pretty popular even without masks, but I’ve been surprised with the return of the wink. It’s making a comeback, which is great, but be careful how you use it- a friend at work is totally fine but maybe hold off on winking at strangers in alleyways.
4. Laughs
More like chuckles and giggles– a form of laughter that feels so forced it hurts. Without smiles we feel this need to respond with light laughter. Someone tells you a mildly amusing story and, because you can’t smile, you break out in these hiccup-like laughs. We all have one and each is slightly different: some are high pitched, some are muffled, others actually say “Ha-Ha.”
5. Deep eye contact
Are we having a conversation or seeing who blinks first? Your guess is as good as mine. Maybe it’s because we all feel so isolated right now, but I feel like I have made eye contact with more people now than I ever did before. Is a lot of eye contact the way we’re trying to bond with each other? Or are we just examining each other’s eye makeup? (side note for the ladies: eye makeup is the only makeup we need these days!)
This year has been challenging but we will always find a way to stay connected, whether it’s laughing too loudly or waving your arms around. We need people - so even if you’re working from home it’s important to find a space like Engage where you can go and reconnect with the world with or without a smile.
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