5 Stress-Zapping Self-Care Exercises
As an attorney, you’re expected to get the job done quickly (with the right answers) and be available whenever needed. And (of course) grow your business. Which can be stressful, to say the least.
Unfortunately, the pandemic has made things even worse. Although working from home more often has its perks, it’s further blurred the line between work and personal. And it’s made managing your team more time-consuming.
Because you’re not sure what to do about it, you tell yourself that it’s just part of being a lawyer. I’m here to tell you that’s not true. It’s time to take control of your stress before it gets the best of you.
Your Body & Mind on Stress
Short-term bursts of stress can be good. It increases alertness and provides an adrenaline rush.
But go too long and you end up in a state of chronic stress, which your body isn’t built for. The consequences of chronic stress include:
High blood pressure.
A weakened immune system.
Inhibition of cognitive and problem-solving functions.
Poor sleep and insomnia.
Impaired memory.
Anxiety and panic attacks.
Depression.
All of this won’t just make you feel bad, but will impact your mood and work. And eventually, it will burn you out.
You can only deal with it for so long before turning to unhealthy coping behaviors, such as emotional eating and binge drinking (there’s a reason lawyers have a higher-than-average rate of drug and alcohol abuse).
Worried that you might be burning out and not sure what to do about it? Listen to Episode 19 of the Life & Law Podcast for the Symptoms, Sources and Solutions to Lawyer Burnout.
The Secret to Effective Stress Management
In my experience, most chronically stressed lawyers acknowledge their need to better manage stress yet don’t believe they have control over what’s causing them to feel stressed.
Contrary to popular belief, external events aren’t the primary source of most stress. What causes the most stress? Your thoughts and how you process them (and the feelings created thereby).
Imagine that you’re working against a tight deadline on a big project for a new client. And then the deadline gets moved even closer. Is that stressful? Absolutely. But you have control over how you respond, which will determine how much stress you feel (and how you perceive that stress).
You could choose to focus on how unfair it is, complain incessantly and take your emotions out on your team (while aggravating an ulcer you thought you had control of). Or you could reframe the situation as a challenging learning experience that will sharpen your leadership skills.
Research shows that how you feel about stress matters. If you’re stressed but don’t see it as harmful, then you’re less likely to be negatively impacted than if you perceive the stress as a bad thing.
Your mentality is the secret ingredient to taking control of your stress. That’s why so many effective stress management techniques (such as deep breathing, mindfulness and meditation) are designed to:
Calm and refocus your mind.
Increase awareness (around your thoughts, stress triggers and habitual reactions).
Objectively observe and process thoughts.
Learn more about the science behind stress (and the part your lawyer-trained brain plays) in Life & Law Podcast Episode 2: The Truth About Lawyer Stress (And What To Do About It).
5 Simple Stress-Zapping Exercises
Here are 5 effective stress management exercises (that take very little time, so can be done even when you’re busy):
#1: Stress Journal (And Sit with Your Thoughts)
Here’s an effective exercise for retaking control of your emotions, becoming more self-aware and objectively processing thoughts and feelings:
Take a couple of deep, slow breaths through your nose to calm your mind.
Get out a journal or piece of paper and answer the following questions (in order):
What triggered your stress?
What specific emotions are you feeling?
What thoughts or beliefs are behind those emotions?
Sit with your thoughts and feelings for 24-48 hours. If a decision must be made before that time, then try to go as long as you can (at least a couple of hours).
After you’ve sat with your emotions and thoughts, review your prior answers and ask what you could do about the situation. List all options.
Choose what to do (if anything).
#2 4-8-7 Breathing Technique
The 4-8-7 breathing technique is perfect for anyone who likes the idea of meditation but has trouble staying focused. It will help you break the stress response (through your breathing), be more present and refocus so that you can get back on track.
Here’s how this technique works:
Breathe in (slowly) through your nose for 4 seconds.
Hold your breath for 7 seconds.
Exhale slowly through your mouth for 8 seconds.
Repeat (as long as you want, but at least 5 times).
#3 Mindful Walking
Exercise is a well-known stress-buster. It refocuses your mind and interrupts the stress response. And specific types of activities (such as yoga and tai chi) force you to breathe deeply, which immediately calms your mind.
Don’t have time for a full workout? Go for a 10-minute mindful walk, which combines the positive effects of moving, deep breathing and mindfulness.
Here’s what to do:
Start by creating a rhythm to your breathing and your steps. Pay attention to your breathing and focus on how it feels.
Once a comfortable rhythm is set, identify 5 things that you see (individually). Linger on each item and focus on colors, textures and whatever else that you see.
Next, individually identify 4 sounds. Closely observe each one before moving on to the next.
Then, identify 3 things that you smell. Once again, focus on each specific smell before moving on.
Finally, touch 2 things (separately) and pay attention to how each one feels
#4: Move to Music
The following activity is a great way to incorporate some lighthearted fun into your day while providing a pattern interrupt from stress so that you can regroup.
Here’s what to do:
Take out your phone (or turn on the radio).
Pick a song or station at random.
Move or dance to the music (through one complete song).
Make sure to pick your song at random (don’t cheat!).
#5: Reframe in Gratitude
A regular gratitude practice retrains your mind to see the world (and process your thoughts) differently. It’s a proven way to reduce stress and feel happier. Which is why I recommend that you start practicing gratitude daily.
In addition, you can combine both gratitude and a technique called reframing to reduce stress when something has happened that’s out of your control (and stressful). Here’s how it works:
When something stressful occurs, identify your growth opportunities (what’s gained, learned or developed).
Reframe your situation focusing on the positive.
Identify what you’re grateful for in this opportunity. And then explain why.
Note: reframing isn’t about ignoring the negative aspects of a situation. It’s about refocusing on the positive aspects so that you don’t obsess over the negative.
These exercises will help you get more control of stress. And they’ll help you make better decisions for yourself moving forward (so that you can prevent future stress from ever occurring).
To take these concepts even further, listen to Life & Law Podcast Episode 7: Mindfulness For Stress Prevention.
About the Author
Engage Workspace for Lawyers is an office space for lawyers built by lawyers. Unlike other coworking spaces, Engage charges a flat monthly rate for access to a full suite of resources and limits membership to a community of lawyers. If you are looking for law office space where you can focus on your practice and be surrounded by great colleagues, please contact us or book a tour.
© Elysium Consulting LLC dba Engage Workspace for Lawyers. 2018-2023. Represented by intellectual property law firm, Klemchuk PLLC.
Heather Moulder is a recovering attorney (of over 18 years), lawyer success coach, and host of the Life & Law Podcast. She helps purpose-driven lawyers create their version of success in both law and life without burning out. And she’s passionate about helping attorneys reconnect to the spark that made them want to be a lawyer in the first place.
When she’s not helping her clients rebalance their lives (while growing their business by as much as $200,000 in just one year), you’ll often find Heather cheering on her 2 baseball-crazed boys in the hot Texas sun.
To begin creating your version of success in both life and law, get your copy of the Life & Law Roadmap for the top 5 steps Heather took to transform from burned out to balanced (while building a $2.5MM+ practice).